A Superficial Happiness

Posted: May 9, 2013 in poetry
Tags: ,

Wrote this poem today. This is how I feel right now. It’s not the best poem I’ve ever written, it’s not even that good really but I just wanted to get some feeling out & in writing

A superficial happiness
May distract me for a while
I can sometimes feel content
& even paint a smile

I can push away the hurt
But not for very long
It rushes back so powerfully
Singing its enticing song

Negativity is me
Badness runs through my core
As months & years go by
The bad gets more & more

A deep emotional pain
Is the essence of my being
It clings to every inch of my soul
& from it there is no fleeing

A self hate so deep
That it skews all my perception
It hurts my heart
To look at my own reflection

A self defeating mentality
My mind seeks to destroy
To break me, to kill me
Is It’s ultimate ploy

Flirting with madnesses
But this is my reality
I know this will never cease
Until it causes my fatality

  1. cptsd2013 says:

    Very powerful and touching!

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